Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
is wine microwaveable?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
