I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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