WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize