JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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