Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Randomize
