You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
