I wanna bring you to show and tell
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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