Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
