found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize