I wish i was in the wii world.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
