the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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