ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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