omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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