I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I currently don't understand fingers.
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