you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
