can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
