pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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