I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
