Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize