Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(408): View more from California

i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both

(650): View more from California

i think otters can do that

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(317): View more from Indiana

I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.

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(847): View more from Illinois

it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs

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(913): View more from Kansas

I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??

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(254): View more from Texas

Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.

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(516): View more from New York

I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.

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(561): View more from Florida

Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?

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(303): View more from Colorado

Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms

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