Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
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