TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize