its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I think your dad took our porno
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
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