I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
