Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize