Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
