Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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