the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
