could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
