He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
