The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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