I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
