I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
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don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
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if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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