Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
you didnt know i had herpes?
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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