the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How's work?
Spinning.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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