doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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