It's Friday. Sex?
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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