I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
