just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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