69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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