Texts From Last Night

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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad

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  (608): you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad http://tfl.nu/bx6b
  Replies (9) Good night (3790) Bad night (1048)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party

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  (512): honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party http://tfl.nu/io10
  Replies (6) Good night (2181) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.

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  (859): He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends. http://tfl.nu/6utj
  Replies (11) Good night (1354) Bad night (2830)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation

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  (978): also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation http://tfl.nu/1tpq
  Replies (4) Good night (1624) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.

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  (917): He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat. http://tfl.nu/cst7
  Replies (6) Good night (1372) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.

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  (715): I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE. http://tfl.nu/ipmq
  Replies (6) Good night (881) Bad night (1056)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick

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  (419): If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick http://tfl.nu/n6tx
  Replies (7) Good night (968) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.

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  (541): Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude. http://tfl.nu/4zcp
  Replies (22) Good night (894) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.

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  (516): He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever. http://tfl.nu/8pla
  Replies (4) Good night (1987) Bad night (406)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Omg sara

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty

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  (920): I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3 (906): Omg sara (920): I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty http://tfl.nu/fytc
  Replies (8) Good night (1549) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated

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  (212): so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated http://tfl.nu/0gd1
  Replies (2) Good night (634) Bad night (264)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.

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  (770): I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos. http://tfl.nu/mg7r
  Replies (4) Good night (347) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.

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  (904): I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE. http://tfl.nu/5ef6
  Replies (1) Good night (136) Bad night (416)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!

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  (519): Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night! http://tfl.nu/q7p9
  Replies (1) Good night (464) Bad night (197)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?

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  (267): do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate? http://tfl.nu/3j8j
  Replies (3) Good night (601) Bad night (199)

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