i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
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the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
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I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes