You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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