All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
