She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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