we're blogging at a bar
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
