fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
