you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
