"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Randomize
