Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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