after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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