I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
