summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize